Just BE.

I'm still alive. I am.

As always, this era of motherhood, this life of a mom, swirls in, out, with, and around me like the seasons- with change and comfort, busy and rest, new and old.  The holidays of back-to-back hosting and list-checking kept me from writing for a spell.  But I maintained a sense of peace throughout by inwardly processing all the things I was thankful for.  Making mental blog titles and journal entries to re-start when I felt ready. When I could sit down again.

To prepare myself for another new season, I have been praying and thinking on what I will look like in the coming months. What will my work accomplish?  How will I grow?  What does God want to teach me?

In recent conversations with two friends, I was spurred on in my quest to establish a theme for myself this year.  In one word, how could I begin 2014 with purpose? Was it PEACE I craved?  Sure, but that wasn't the heart of my prayers.  Was it JOY or HEALTH or SUCCESS?  All of those things would be wonderfully welcome, but I couldn't settle on the one thing I longed to meditate on.

As I journaled one morning, the pen established my thoughts, "I need to be..."  And then it stopped.  There.  In cursive lowercase letters, I found it.  I wrote it again, but this time in capitals, "BE."  With punctuation.

I texted my friend with this new revelation, "I just want to BE.  Not strive. Not stress.  Not whine or wish.  Just BE!  Be present. Be in the Spirit.  Be me..."

And so I continue reflecting on that single verb.  It will probably appear in future posts and status updates as I ponder more on what it means to BE. I'm looking up verses like, "Be still and know..." or "Be strong and courageous..."

And now that my fingertips are back to hitting the keys, I know also that it's good to be back. :-)

What is your word for the year?